A new chill out avenue - Nadi Annissa

I am so excited to share the link on this particular Non-Profit Muslimah Organization:

Nadi Annissa FB Page.

Nadi Annissa blogsite

Please click on the links above to check out the sites and spread the word about this place.

A weekend parenting course - Powered by AlKauthar Institute

A weekend parenting course to build an Islamic home.

Monday 15th August, 2011

Salam Akasyah,


Ayah has been doing a great job in taking care of the both of us. At first, it feels like we both are struggling with some personal and financial issues. Ibu knows Ayah wants the best for his family and he must have felt like he's under alot of pressure and beyond any control of how things will work out in the near future. But Ibu believes strongly that Allah will take great care just like how He has helped me during my lowest points in life. Anyways, our family is there to lend a hand...

Don't worry as things will work out and just have faith that God knows best as He is the Master Planner of Destiny. All you have to do is be ready to come out anytime after Christmas and give Ibu and Ayah ample time to get ready for your arrival.

Lotsa luv n schweet tots,
Ibu

Sunday 7th August, 2011

Salam bebe ibu,

Ayah and Ibu has decided to look into the option of a gentle, unhindered physiological birth to welcome you into our arms.

We want the best experience for you and myself (and of course to be easy on Ayah's pocket ^_^)

So let the 3 of us work together and prepare ourselves to go through this beautiful jorney together. On another note, Ayah is featured in the Star Newspaper :

Would you go on a solo camping trip? The Star

Ibu and Ayah can't wait to be with you and for the next checkup please do cooperate and show us your 'weewee' as we are getting your stuff ready...

Lotsa luv n schweet tots,
Ibu

5th June, 2011

Salam bebe,

It's a peaceful Sunday. Next week we might be on the busy track again, Ayah and Ibu. Just an update, Ibu had just resigned from my existing post as an IT executive just a few days ago. Fortunately, because of you I received a much better job proposition and I might start in a couple of weeks time.

Ibu and Ayah went to see Dr. M last Friday. Ayah get to see you for the very first time on the ultrasound scan screen. In about 3 weeks time we will be seeing you again. From this checkup, your heart is beating fine and you've grown so much from the last time Ibu saw you. You've grown from slighly over a centimeter do about 4cm. You've done well!

You are now in your 11th week according to the scan machine and in a couple of weeks time we both would've passed our 3 months mark! We have had such a successful 1st trimester ^_^ That would mean you have been with us throughout our Kayak Tour. You are a strong survivor and a very loyal and good companion to me, in my best and worst of times.

Now that your heartbeat has been detected, the chances of losing you have greatly reduced and we hope we get to see you in due time.

Be good, stay active, play and sleep well. Just ignore Ibu's stress hormones nd let me just cry it out like good ol' times...

Like what the doctor said, " The baby is like a fruit, when it's ripe it'll come..."

Lotsa luv and schweet tots,
Ibu

Friday the 13th, May 2011

Salam anak Ibu,

I just came back from seeing Dr. Michaelsamy of Gleneagles Ampang...He's Nenna's (Ibu's mother) obgyn. He is the soft spoken and gentle doctor who delivered your uncle and aunts (Pak Lang, Mak Teh and Maksu) back when he served Tawakal Hospital.

Ibu scheduled a 4.30pm appointment as I want to make sure you are alright.

At this point of time, Ayah is very busy adjusting to his life back in Malaysia after a good 8 years or so in Germany. And it's only been a few months since he came back for good that Ayah and Ibu tied the knot at the end of February. Then, the both of us are busy juggling and balancing our new life together. In early April, Ayah decided to bring along Ibu on our special one-of-a-kind Honeymoon Kayak Tour. We spent a week kayaking in Tasik Kenyir and another week in Tasik Temenggor, without realizing that you were with us the whole time since the beginning of our honeymoon...and when we came back Ayah had to straightaway get busy with his online webshop ( http://www.footsteps.com.my/) where he sells travel and outdoor gears.

A week after we came back from the honeymoon, I missed my period and we found out about you!

So, Ibu was in Dr. M's office clinic. Finally I get to see you from the ultrasound scan screen. I get to see your heartbeat. Dr. M was really happy to be able to detect your heartbeat and he went on to let me know that you are most likely to arrive between Christmas and New Year. What do you reckon? Do you want to see us this year or the next? Ibu don't really mind as long as you are healthy and happy. As of this day's checkup, you are about 1cm in length and 7 weeks old according to the Naegele's Rule that he's using.

But by right, you are actually about 5 weeks. Ibu wants you to take it easy. We are deciding your name so when you are ready, please show your 'special part' so that we can pick a name for you! ^_^

Lotsa luv n schweet tots,
Ibu

1st May 2011 (about 3 weeks or so after conception)

Sunday...
Salam anak Ibu,
This is my second note to you since the last time (about a month or so back in March)...it's been quite a while that I've written because this book (my bedside journal) fell behind Ayah's and Ibu's headboard.

Just so you know, this is a long weekend holiday as today is Labor Day (a special holiday or off day for people who go to work and earn a living depending on a monthly pay-cheque)...since the Public Holiday falls on a Sunday so the off day is brought forward to tomorrow so Ibu don't actually have to go to work...in fact I can prolong my leave until Tuesday as per Aunty Medi's instruction...
You see...last Thursday Ibu found some staining of blood on Ibu's underpants. That could mean 2 things:
1) I have some problems, or
2) You might be in trouble as you are in my tummy now...

So Ibu have to rest well and not move alot so that the both of us will be safe and healthy and can be together till end of gestation. As of now, you are most likely to be about 4 weeks or so and right now your development are as such:

1) heart is being formed
2) lungs are being formed
3) lips and fingers/toes are developing

I am so grateful and beyond happy to know of your existence the earliest possible. You are indeed God's gift to both Ayah and Ibu...We just can't wait to see you in due time... ^_^

Okay, so here's a list of Ibu's wishes for you:
1) Ibu wants you to be calm and happy in my womb - trust that I'll take care of your well being
2) Be active and and be happy
3) Listen intently whenever Ibu recite the surrahs from Quran, dua and singsong lullaby to you
4) Be grateful for the nutrients/food source that you are replenish with from God via Ayah - it's to keep both of us healthy, strong and safe from harm
5) Know that people love you and are waiting for your arrival. You being here makes so many people happy, especially Ayah and Ibu...
6) Be strong for me as I am for you...be my ever faithful companion in best and worst of times...
7) Ibu wants a gentle, unhindered physiological birth experience for the both of us....so please make sure you are always in the most optimal position for birth - Left Occiput Anterior (LOA) so we can both achieve a beautiful birth reunion...
Lotsa luv and schweet tots,
Ibu

23/03/2011 - Last Menstrual Period Start Date

[A day after my 29th birthday]


Salam anak ibu...Yesterday ibu punya ulang tahun ke-29! What a day it was...in the morning Ibu was anticipating you so much...Ibu went to the toilet and did the pregnancy test. But it showed me the negative result instead... :( But Ibu know that you are there in my belly.

So I went about my day feeling subdued. Had a talk with your Ayah. He's being really sweet and kind. Then Ibu made the mistake of taking papaya and milk combo in the morning...

I paid heavily for it. It was excruciatingly painful and I was down with tummy ache/acute abdominal cramping that I had to go and see Aunty Medi (Ibu and Ayah's preferred GP at Desa Pandan and our record goes way back since our high school years). She gave Ibu medicine to soothe my tummy ache and also a delicious home baked cupcake.

I just have a feeling that YOU are in me...(well at least half of you are already in me...just waiting for another half from Ayah to be combine...but let's leave that for later ^_^)

You are my best birthday gift Ever ever ever...can't wait to meet you.

Lotsa luv n schweet tots,

Ibu

Please come to this talk and be educated about risk of vaccination

Our Birth Preferences (to be applied to a hospital birth setting)

A lot had happened after this blog has been revived...so after this post there'll be many more to come to reflect on the progress (or lack of it) in the local homefront surrounding women's choices when it comes to birthing our babies...

It all started (the media frenzy, I mean) with this article:
DIY Mums: No doctors, please!

And subsequently of course it has opened the Pandora Box and this response letter was published by the same paper in the days following the 2-page spread:
Natural birth: Beware the danger

And recently there's another response:
DIY Mums:Someone qualified should be present

What they fail to realise is that we, the informed parents and adults, have preference to opt for home birth because we want to achieve a natural, gentle physiological birth without any unnecessary and risky medical interventions, that is prevalent in a normal hospital birth setting.

We want to avoid this from happening:
Gleaneagles Ampang obgyn was acquitted from a lawsuit that was throwned at him by a grieving husband whose wife had bled to death due to uninformed induction procedure

So if you were to understand how our body works and go back to the basics to make sure that we can have an optimal birthing experience that is both rewarding and beneficial for a lifetime, wouldn't you want to find a way to achieve it?

The question is, are the practising medical officers and the whole maternity care system willing to revamp their status quo and make way for the gentle,physiological births to happen in the hospital setting?

If they are willing to understand and cooperate with us, the paying customers with rights, than we are more than happy to deliver/receive our precious bundle of joy in the hospital but with so many negative stories surrounding hospital births, one would think twice to go down that path. Come to think of it, how many times have you heard of mothers recalling their hospital birth experience as something that they cherish and looked forward to experience again with their next child??? Share with me if you can find an obgyn and labor ward team that can agree to this birth preferences plan:

Sharing my BIRTH PREFERENCES SAMPLE for hospital birth (as a response to the latest media frenzy on the HB/UC movement):
(Primum non nocere is a Latin phrase that means "First, do no harm". Nonmaleficence, which derives from the maxim, is one of the principal precepts of medical ethics that all medical students are taught in medical school and is a fundamental principle for emergency medical services around the world. Another way to state it is that "given an existing problem, it may be better not to do something, or even to do nothing, than to risk causing more harm than good." It reminds the physician and other health care providers that they must consider the possible harm that any intervention might do. It is invoked when debating the use of an intervention that carries an obvious risk of harm but a less certain chance of benefit - taken from Wikipedia)

Dear Obgyn,


We (my birthing companion and I) trust your ability as a licensed medical practioner and have faith in your judgement in practising and applying your Hippocratic Oath of 'Primum non nocere' - First, do no harm, when it comes to assisting us in the birth of our baby.

We have chosen the HypnoBirthing method of gentle, unhindered physiological birth.

My birth shall entail the following (if at all,any special circumstances occur, that requires any medical interventions and a revise in this optimal birth preferences, then the benefits and risks involved in the procedure would have to be acknowledged by both my birth companion and I. We have the right to find any possible alternatives to the intervention/s proposed or to just hold it out and decide to wait until we can agree on the best way forward. If at all, there's any reason that you may not or would not be able to comply to this birth plan, then we have the right to find an alternative healthcare provider):

1st stage of labor

We would prefer that any hospital/medical staff involve in our birth shall maintain an atmosphere of calm and respect towards us (the family which includes my birth companion, myself and the baby).



We would appreciate if we were to be given the liberty of time and not to be rush through the labor and birth. We would not consent of any induction/augmentation of labor and birth, unless it is deemed necessary and the full risks and benefits of the procedure explained thoroughly.



We would prefer to be allowed to create an atmosphere that can promote the natural flow of the labor and birth hormone - Oxytocin. It is by making the room as private and comfortable as being in our own sanctuary with the lights dimmed, with soft background music of our choice, and we are allowed to wear our own clothing/apparel instead of the hospital gown. And to add on to that, we only allow named personnel to enter the birthing room to keep it private and unintrusive.



We would appreciate that no episiotomy is to be performed as we would rather risk a natural tear, if at all, rather than having to fix an episiotomy that would have to take a longer time to heal. We would apply the breathing techniques from the hypnobirthing course to breathe down the baby and allowing the natural expulsion reflex work in tandem with the uterine contractions to naturally expel the baby. We do not need any staff directed pushing.



We would appreciate to not have any artificial rupture of membrane and/or amniotomy procedure to be performed, unless deemed necessary, and our informed consent have to be seeked prior to it being performed. We would prefer to have a spontaneous rupture of membrane instead.



We would appreciate to not have any vaginal examination performed on me and not to be informed of the progress of the labor/birth (dilatation or time of contraction etc) as this will affect me psychologically and emotionally which might hinder the progress of my labor and birth.



We would appreciate to have freedom of movement and of changing the birth positions (sitting, squatting, walking about the labor ward etc) to allow optimal birth conditions and aid in the ease of the baby's descent through the birth canal. To allow this, we would prefer no fetal monitoring or IV drip to be strapped on me during the labor and birth. We would also prefer not to be lying on the back in supine position with the legs placed in stirrups as it will decrease the space in the birth canal and prolong the labor.



We would appreciate to be allowed to maintain a high energy level by eating, drinking and resting/relaxing throughout the labor and birth.



We would appreciate to not have painkiller suggested by the medical staff and no artificial substances to be administered during labor and birth, unless requested by either one of us. We would prefer to leverage on the body's natural hormone and neurochemical (Oxytocin, endorphin, prolactin etc) to achieve a comfortable and manageable labor.



2nd stage of labor

We would prefer that my birth companion is to receive the baby and announce the gender of the baby immediately after the baby's exit.



We would prefer to do a Lotus birth where we let the umbilical cord lay intact until it dries off by itself.



We would also want immediate skin-to-skin contact for mother, father and baby and no rub-down is required as we would want the baby's skin to absorb the vernix. Also, we would prefer not to have the baby's mouth and nose/airways to be suctioned by the suctioning bulb and no eye ointments to be applied to the eye region.



We would appreciate it if any test (i.e. Apgar) is to be conducted, then it must be with our informed consent and with either one of us present during the test/procedure.

3rd stage of labor

We would prefer the placenta to be birth spontaneously via nipple stimulation, visualisation etc and no cord traction or augmentation using artificial substances to be performed unless deemed necessary in the case of hemorrhaging.



After birth

We would prefer for baby to be roomed-in.

We would also appreciate to be given time to bond with the baby and establish breast feeding immediately after birth with breast crawl and direct latch method within the first 2 hours of birth. We would prefer not to have any formula milk to be given to the baby at any time without our informed consent.

We thank you in advance for your total understanding, cooperation and undivided support to our birth preferences. We welcome you to join us in our gentle, unhindered physiological birth.

My blog is now officially a gentle, physiological birth advocacy platform!

Salam...

Tonight marks the time in history as I will officially announce and share my blog link for the first time EVER with my circle of friends! What I aspire for my blog to be is a space that readers can find something beneficial and/or relevant for them to share with their circle of contacts.

For those who are here reading and going through my shared links (please refer to the right panel - the title of the pages listed will bring you to the links) THANK YOU and WELCOME! ^_^

I hope you can share your feedbacks so that I can revised this space to function better with time. I would really appreciate them. Just a kind note : this site is progressive & dynamic; I will make time to update this space on a weekly basis (just because I am working full time & also in my 3rd trimester of pregnancy ^_^) So do stay tuned and bear with the changes and update.

p/s: most of the links and infos I shared over here is courtesy of the The Gentle Birthing Group Malaysia and also from my own findings.

XOXO

Note to self regarding the right to birth (shared over from my notes at GBG)

Morning mamas...after attending WH's hypnobirthing classes and spending a lot of time reading countless of evidence-based articles (shared here by Team Awesome and the ones that I found through googeling) on birthing (any kinds possible,as both the good & the bad birth stories,has something for us to learn about),I discovered a few things that I feel is important to be shared with those who wants to have a beautiful physiological birth experience (regardless of the venue but in a conducive environment where the mother gets to be herself & her surroundings-people involved,ambience etc allows her to just let her be):
1) this baby in your womb NOW,only have ONE chance and ONE way to be birth...once he/she has been successfully birthed (read:alive) they will take with them their birthing experience for the rest of their life (supressed in the sub-conscious & express externally through their temperaments and approach to life-FIRST IMPRESSION COUNTS!) This means that you can have an easy/safe birth with the help of medical interventions (read:drugs/artificial substances/standard medical procedures-long list of them) but IT DOES NOT GUARANTEE that you will have an easy baby/person (because babies are indeed human being with souls that can feel emotions and have progressive thoughts since in the womb and are conscious during their birthing process) to deal with,the rest of your life.Of course damage control can be done (bonding to be re-establish etc) but it means that you will have to invest EXTRA effort & resources to get the optimum parent-child relationship in which you can get EFFORTLESSLY through a natural physiological gentle birthing of your child.As long as the child is still in the womb, EVERY SECOND COUNTS and there is still a chance for them to have a great entrance in this life...[Time that you seek is a time that will slip but the time that you make is always there](no excuse for busyness/no available time - time is just a perception, it is YOUR perception and maybe being pregnant & having this baby will teach you to prioritize & multitask just because FAMILY COMES FIRST.
(p/s:this is me in the 1st tri...excited,scared,busy,ignorant,no time (time spent more on other 'stuff') etc...but I want to give my child the very best that I can so Alhamdulillah God directs me in all the possible direction in order for me to be able to do so...)
2) BE ACCOUNTABLE, RESPONSIBLE & LOVING PARENT BY MAKING INFORMED DECISIONS- only YOU know what YOU WANT FOR YOUR BABY & YOURSELF in regards to bringing your baby out to share this life with you.So apply the same decision-making process that you have been doing your entire life to your birthing experience and don't leave it to others (medical practitioners/family/friends etc) to decide for you and then at the end when you are not feeling positively towards your birthing experience you move forward with blame or guilt...this should be the best way of getting what YOU WANT for the birthing event: INTENTION (set your goals)->FACT FINDING THROUGH TRUSTED RESOURCES TO JUSTIFY YOUR DECISION->DECIDE->INFORM/TELL/EXPRESS YOUR DECISION TO THOSE THAT WILL BE INVOLVED IN THE BIRTHING EVENT->CONTINUE TO MOVE IN THE DIRECTION OF YOUR GOAL-> WHICH IS TO GIVE YOUR CHILD HIS GRAND ENTRANCE TO LIFE OUTSIDE THE COMFORT OF THE WOMB
(p/s:take comfort that,at any point of time,your decision is the best for you based on what you know and the resources that you have at that particular point of time...dont beat your self up for your past decisions (but do REVIEW on HOW you get to the decision in the first place and move on forward accepting the fact that if you know better then you will do better and work on the best ways to get the knowledge you need in order for you to do so...that is why it is always best to start at the earliest possible as every second counts...the faster you know the more time you have to respond to a certain situation/issue that might come in between you,your baby & his/her grand entrance to life)
3) EACH BIRTH IS UNIQUE=DIFFERENT (AS UNIQUE & DIFFERENT AS THUMBPRINTS,CORNEA & TONGUE) NEVER TAKE ON/IN ANOTHER MOTHERS' BIRTHING EXPERIENCE AS YOUR OWN
-your level of tolerance towards 'contraction pain'/surge sensations & intensity for hypnobirthers, is relative (some would call it being in slight discomfort/uncomfortable but bearable,painless,the worst thing I had etc)
-common medical system benchmarks (baby size-which is usually inaccurate anyways via ultrasound & YOUR BABY FITS YOU JUST RIGHT NEVER TOO BIG OR TOO SMALL,amniotic fluid,the dreaded due date etc) are CONVENIENT FACTORS for the practitioners,but for expecting mothers they will become LIMITATIONS...which directs me to the next point
4) HUMAN SPECIES ARE DESIGNED FOR SURVIVAL (for thousands of generations & more to come) and the modern medical system has only been around since being revolutionized in the 19th century.Our anatomy & physiological process is perfectly designed for our survival of the species purpose. you dont need a doctor to birth your baby.our ancestors birth their babies by themselves and they dont need to understand how or what is the process,but they are just in tune with their body ('listening' to cues, intuition-primal/mothers' instinct etc) and their baby.But we,modern thinking humans,brought up by modern technology,systems & processes,have to satisfy our rational/irrational thoughts on birth by going to see the doctors and trusting that they know best how to handle our own birthing event.they need to have those machines and tests because they dont have the baby in their belly...we dont need those invasive medical practises as we can feel when something is not right.PAIN is GOOD because it indicates/tells you that something is not right in the places you can't see,so that you can do something about it.HAVE FAITH & PUT BACK THE TRUST IN YOURSELF THAT YOU CAN BIRTH YOUR BABY WITHOUT INTERVENTION AS YOUR BABY HAS CHOSEN TO BE BIRTH BY YOU...